| Yeah. |
[13 Aug 2006|11:35pm] |
So, I want a new lj name, but all the ones I think of they are already taken.
And LJ is pissing me off lately, well I guess I'm really just pissing myself off becuase I always think of entries and I'm never around LJ to put them in.
Pooo.
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(and let the music play)
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| Warped Tour 06 |
[28 Jul 2006|04:19pm] |
Warped Tour in Pittsburgh was nothing that I thought it was going to be, I havn't decided if that is a good or bad thing.
I did see Janelle which was a bad thing and that managed to ruin most of my day.
But I crowd surfed for the first time in Senses Fail's pit. Their pit was insane, I loved it. I saw Armor for Sleep play and a lot of other bands.
It was cool.
Yeah.
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(1 turned it up | and let the music play)
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| From the Beginning. |
[26 Jul 2006|07:25am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 confused |
] |
So, it got worse. Not only did we get into a car accident, but Dom was in the process of fixing the car. Note: he wrecked it, he should pay for it. As he is repairing it, his dad is making Kevin's mom pay for all of the repair's. Which is going to be a couple thousand dollars. As being repaired the car gets repossesed because they were just making payments for it. And somehow his mom didn't pay $1000 to it, though Kevin was giving her the money. Which means that she spent 4 payments of around 260 dollars on something other than the car. She took his money and basically used it for herself.
Now, most of this is Kevin's misfortunes and I can only hope that things will get better. After he gets home he realizes that they KICKED him out of college because at ITT you can't miss 3 days in a row he did because of 4th of July, which he didn't know counted, for vacation, and becuase he was too tired from the trip. If he had known the 4th counted he would have wanted tired or not.
Then, our job closed down. Immediatley. I go into work one day and find out that we are closing down THAT night. Lovely really, so the peeople who are working there have no time to look for a new job. No one really told us anything about the other Quizno's, I guess because he and i and a lot of other people were just starting out so we aren't that necassary. But the 2 managers have jobs there. We don't really matter. Since there is no moneye coming in, Kevin can't live at his apartment any more. He really wasn't he was basically getting ready to move into my house, but I wake up one morning to an eviction notice.
Not to mention our phone has been shut off since florida and now our internet is. So, I'm beyong pissed and my mom disrespected Kevin. She is the one always inviting him to stay and have food and such and then she started bitching about how he is eating tons of food and how he isn't paying for utilities; she never said he had to. He was going to as soon as he was moved in, they already talked about it.
So we have;
car accident
car repossesed
no apartment
no college
no job
no home
no phone/internet
I don't want all of this to be like how it always is. We are getting evicted AGAIN. I am tired of being like t his. So, In a spurt I decided that i would move to Salem with Kevin in his mom's basement. My whole room was cleaned out in a day and is cleaned out now. I am now living in Salem and I will be. I don't know for how long, but we both need jobs to get us out of here faster. If he just movied here tthen I would never see him since he has no car. No one would take me to see him.
Basically; it is a lose lose situation for me. I moved and now i miss the shit out of my family and friends already. And if I stayed I would miss him too much.
I really don't know what to do with myself. One minute I am balling because I am still a kid. I am going to be missing out on tons of things that would give me happyness; then another minute i am smiling because I am happy because I am with him.
i don't know what is going to happen; but I do know I'm still going to Warped Tour.
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(and let the music play)
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| Some of the bad. |
[22 Jul 2006|05:15pm] |
Well, Quizno's closed last night. Forver. Well, atleast the one in Boardman. It pretty much blows. My first job havn't even worked there a whole month, well maybe I have. And it closed. We found out that night. I guess we just weren't getting enough business.
So, I have no job and neither does my boy.
I feel bad; he is losing everything; except me.
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(2 turned it ups | and let the music play)
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| :DD |
[21 Jul 2006|10:33am] |
Honestly, I have been having some good conversations with people I don't talk to much anymore.
I really like it and it really makes me feel like something important.
All is going well really; :D
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(3 turned it ups | and let the music play)
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| Thinkin; |
[21 Jul 2006|10:30am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 blah |
] |
I go to Pittsburgh's warped tour in 6 days.
Fucking sweet.
I'm going with my boy, Dani, Sarah McNeal, and Sara.
Srsly, this will be kick ass.
:DD
I want to make a new lj name, I don't know what though.
Fuddgggg.
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(4 turned it ups | and let the music play)
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| Vacation? |
[19 Jul 2006|11:33am] |
we went on vacation to florida.
got in a car accident.
got to catch star fish, crabs, fish, lizards, and shrimp.
lost them all.
got sun burned.
spend time with some good friends.
swim in the ocean.
have a good time.
have a bad time.
I wouldn't have asked for more.
Except for more alone time with my boy.
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(4 turned it ups | and let the music play)
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| Regret. |
[26 Jun 2006|10:07pm] |
Sadie won't shut the fuck up.
I guess I should have made my last entry private. Because I knew shit would hit the fan once I posted it. Because I needed to say it. I needed to say all of that more than anything. The last thing that I need rightn now is going in my room and crying because I hurt my friends or because I'm lame.
But I did say all of that. I called no one a bad friend. I said "Good friends, huh?" Not making a specific point.
I don't know what to say reallly ,because no one is going to talk to me until I give them an apology. But I am always the one apologizing. I really am tired of it. Because all I do is make mistakes. When am I ever going to learn?
Work was hard today. I am worn out. And stick, but I don't feel like taking a shower. Tomarrow is a day off, so what.
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(3 turned it ups | and let the music play)
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| Oh boy, have I been needing to make an entry |
[23 Jun 2006|03:14pm] |
I have been craving to update, but my internet has been discounected for a day or so, so I couldnt.
First off, I have gotten my first job at Quizno's. Though I like subway better, this place is still cool. I know most of the people that I work with already so it's not that bad. Not to mention that my boyfriend is going to be getting a temorary job there. So that will be interesting. My first day there...
(to be continued...)
So my entire entry just got deleted. I'm pissed. But.
My first day there was pretty good and I wasn't as nervous as I thought i was going to be. My second day sucked, I mean I didn't put chicken on a roasted chicken salad. Oh well. My third day was fun. I liked the two people I worked with, it was fun. And today is my fourth day and I work at 4. I wish I would get paid already. They held my first pay check or something. I don't know why.
So as far as I know Maria and Ashley are mad at me for sure. Maria, Ashley, and Jessie, get mad when we don't tell them things right away. I understand. What I don't understand is when I was talking to Maria, I told her my opinion and she got pissed and is now ignorning me. Hyprocit much? She said that they don't get mad and that they don't judge. What the fuck did she just do then? And of couuuurse she told her buddy Ashley who is now mad at me. Why? No clue. Did I talk to Ashley? No, I did not. So of course she is just mad because Maria is mad. That is how it always works and I'm not the only one that believes that. Jessie is probably mad at me for some reason too. I don't know what though. So now they are ignoring and then the group is going to break up. "Have a good summer, I won't be seeing you" "Yeah after tonight I'm done with Marchesa" Good friends, huh? I didn't do anything. Grow the fuck up. Honestly, is all you guys have to do is fight with me? Good. Yeah, I miss my friends that I made freshmen year, but they are the ones leaving me. I'm use to it.
I want to leave now.
So, where are the friends that said they would always be there for me if I need them?
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(8 turned it ups | and let the music play)
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| What goes down must come up. |
[19 Jun 2006|07:42am] |
I love how no matter how much or little I drink, I always wake up at absurd hours of the morning. Today it was around 5:45 and I didn't go to sleep till around 2 or something. My stomache hurts like a fucking mother and I want a whoole breakfast. I don't know what, anything I eat hurts real bad.
Eggs and toast. MMMM. Someone come and make me them. Today, D Roc and I were suppose to tan it's raining out so now it's muggy. But it's nice and cool outside. I need to wash Dani's shirt. Yeah. I have been wearing it for awhile.
Sunday I went to Berlin Lake with my boy and his friends, it was fun. We went swimming and saw a MASSIVE spider. It's funnt how slow this is taking me compared to my norml skills. It was really nice up at that cottage and his friends ar nice. I must say that I adore Dom, because he seems so innocent, but he really isnt. He has big nipples, they shrink in water. Haha.
Saturday I went to my cousins graduation party and 4 and didnt get home till like 10 30. that is ridiculaous. I think. After I got home I went to Kevin's house and drank with him and his friends because most of his college buddies were in. We went to cry baby bridge in the night and nothing really happened except him brett and i went up and told the cop that came down there that we werent doing anything wrong. Since they all saw a cop and dove into jagger bushes and such. Poor guys. I got to see how they all are and i liked them, they each have something about them. ANd that jimmy isnt so bad when he is alone. Him and his girl broke up, i dont know what to think of that.
I am going to church on sunday..
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(4 turned it ups | and let the music play)
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| That time again |
[13 Jun 2006|01:30pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 anxious |
] |
So, it's summer. My first day off. It sure doesn't seem like it. Though, I can tell now, that this summer is not going to be as hopeful as I thought it was. It is going to be a lazy summer. Not purposefully, but it will happen. That is never fun to have a lazy summer. I am sick and have been sick. I need to shave my legs.
I'm suppose to go to florida with the boyfriend, Sarah, and Dom. I hope that works out. Though I have about 8 cents to my name I am doing cleaning thursday for my aunt so I can atleat make 20 bucks. I have been putting in apps becasue I need money. I need a job.
I didn't really sleep last night. Maybe an hour. Hillary drove in from PA and she came and got bestfriendKevin and I and we went to the park at 3 in the morning, walmart, IHOP, and sheetz. There really was nothing to do. I came home around 5:30 and called my boy. Still havn't slept. No coffee either. Tonight shall be an interesitng night.
I'm not going to Michigan this year. I don't even know if my brother is. My mom and David are going to Disneyland with her new boyfriend, Jack. He has got money. But besides that he is really nice to her and David. They are the ones who need it.
Tomarrow is Kevin and I's seven months. :D
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(2 turned it ups | and let the music play)
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| This time I'll make sure you get them back alright |
[06 Jun 2006|05:26pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 fucked |
] |
Woke up and felt like shit. I woke up crying in pain from my stomache. Called my boyfriend. Got to school felt like shit, just wanted to be with him. Went to Art, told the girls how I feel like shit. The one said her boyfriend yells at her if she tells him that she doesnt feel good and has cramps and he doesnt care. She asked me what my boyfriend does, I said "No, he doesn't do that. He says he is sorry I feel sick. And then when he can he comes over to my house and lays with me to make me feel better." Yeah. But today he is not making me feel better at all.
I called, felt like shit. Because I don't feel good and we really didn't talk. I feel not good, I'm sorry I am not very conversational then. I told him about how I added some people on myspace, mainly girls because they seemed cool and they are friends of a friend. The guys I did not even look at. I couldn't tell you what any of them look like. I told him I added people. Which I never do. And I got a hang up.
Because I added people on myspace. Dang. And I felt like shit more. I'm more vulnerable. Does it matter.
It's fucking myspace. He doesn't understand how much I love him and that he is the only guy I met from myspace that anything did/will happen between us. He is the only one. I should just delete my myspace. The reason I don't is because I'm too much of a picture whore, believe it or not.
What I wanted to do today was, see him. He said he wanted to walk here, but there would be no way he would get to work on time. So he didn't but he did want to see me. And I wanted to see him, but I didn't say it because I knew if I did then I would have told him my plan. Which was, since I have to go Walgreens later when my mom gets home I would get him some food and fix his bracelet I made for him and go visit him. Since I want(ed) to see him. Now, I am not going to see him. As much as I want to. It hurts.
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(2 turned it ups | and let the music play)
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| "Tispy" |
[24 May 2006|08:33pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
distressed |
] |
Last weekend was fun. I hung out with all my friends mainly except D Roc. It suckkked.
Friday... oh right. i went to a section 8 show. it was pretty fun. had a lot of hardcore bands and I now love the band burn the shroud. :D I got kicked in the shoulder and punched in the collar bone. This fucking wigger/hick kid kept coming directly in front of me swinging and looking like a monkey and shit. it got to the point where i would just shove him and get really pissed off. Douche.
I feel fat. I ate too much today. &$&*&*(UIO$UKOJLK$#*&*#*#*!!!~@$*UDJKl
Yeah. Exactly.
Saturday I got to hang out with the girls and we went to boardman park and the village but it was closed. I took a reflector that WAS ALREADY FALLING OFF of the park door and they sort of got pissed. No one misses it, its cool guys. And I seen this kid bryann's signature there, it was pretty cool.
And we went to the.. mall i think. Yeah. and we saw mike and chris. they were the cutest gay kids ever, but they werent "together". they were boy hunting. awe.
Then sunday was a lot of fun because it was my boys and i's day. we went to sarah mcneals graduation ceremony and then went running around. we went to walmart twice. game stop. movie gallery. dollar general and his moms house. im sure more places and we were in salem for like 5 hours about. we got friends for our dinos, cameras, lemons :D, and other things. fun fun fun.
and later we hung out with sarah and drank adn then he came back here and we had a good time.
:]
I love him.
Today i stayed home because of the senior award assembly and I was with my boy and we went to the village and such. it was a good day, but im really tired.
and i really do miss him.
i also miss my camera because best friendkevin has it.
yeah.
anyywas, good night guys.
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(5 turned it ups | and let the music play)
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| 1:13 AM 5.14.06 |
[14 May 2006|01:13am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 giggly |
] |
It's now 1:14 in the morning. My boyfriend is playing Zelda and I am online talking to people and updating.
We are in love. Oh so in love. It is our 6 months today. I thought of all the things I wanted to say to him. Not write them out, but say. And I will.
I have never had anything like this before with anyone else. And I am glad. There is no reason for any of these feelings to be shared with anyone else other than the man I plan to be with the rest of my life. It may sound silly to some, but I honestly don't see us fading. Yes, we will fight still and yes we will still get along. But I know we have come too far and we are both way too happy when things are good to drop everything.
I could never be any happier. Spending time with him is amazing and I notice now more than ever how much more open I am with him. The past couple of days have really shown it to me. Things I was conscience about I am not so much anymore. I let things slide and stuff. I don't know how to put it in words, but I know when I am doing it.
So, I hope everyone is having a good weekend. I love my boyfriend.
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(1 turned it up | and let the music play)
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| Time goes by so fast |
[10 May 2006|10:08pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 content |
] |
I don't know when the last update was, but I have been having fun lately.
My mom is bothering me, a lot. Yes, I understand that she works and needs us to help out around the house. But wtf. If I don't do one thing, which I did do then she bitches at me. I did laundry today and she yelled at me for not doing any. When I did. It's not my fault that on her days off all she does is sleep like yesterday and that my two little brother's do whatever the fuck they want. I mean, of course, they don't have to do anything. And then she just is like well you don't even have a job. Ok, if I did in fact have a job then none of this shit would get done. "You're slacking." She says. Fuck you.
Anyways. I got to hang out with James, Amanda, and BestfriendKevin today. That was pretty cool and I got to chill at JoAnn's for a bit. Am I a nerd for likeing craft stores a lot? Haha oh well.
I walked to my boys house and as I was walking he pullled out and he almost left and then I was going to start crying if he left, but yay he didn't. He saw me.
He is now on the phone with his Best Friend with Girl Parts, Jen. And I don't even mind, because I love her and him both. She has helped our relationship a lot and I know that she keeps Kevin happy.
Our 6 months is coming up. :D
This makes me happy.
And my toe hurts.
But I can't remember what else I wanted this to be about, so latter kids. I will get back on track with my comments to you all.
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(2 turned it ups | and let the music play)
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| Smoking |
[01 May 2006|03:02pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
lethargic |
] |
Smoking cigarettes is a bad habit indeed. It is costly, it consumes time, makes things smell bad and can even make one look unattractive. It can turn people too. Turn people into someone who they are not and how they are not thinking. I asked my boyfriend for a cigarette yesterday just because I needed one. Because, yes, I am addicted. I am sorry. I want to let it go, but I am not ready yet. I need to be ready so that I know I will not look back. I know when I will be ready.
Yes, I did feel bad asking him because I know that he does not approve. But I was desperate. I really couldn't believe that I uttered those words out. My thoughts took over.
But needless to say. I want to quick. I do not know when, but when I do. I know I will be able to and that I will be strong.
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(4 turned it ups | and let the music play)
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